Dying to Self and Growing to Love Others

A few days ago I was asked by a close friend of mine in somewhat of a response to my previous post to share with him the one thing, above all else, that I have learned in my short time in church ministry. I sat in my office holding the phone sipping on a cup of Starbucks coffee just thinking for a moment. Finally, after a few seconds, he broke the silence: “Kirk, you there?” From my side, fifteen seconds to reflect on years worth of ministry in order to answer the question seemed relevant; from the other end of the line, fifteen seconds seemed quite long I guess.

I went on to tell my friend that the one thing I have seen and learned again and again-and really its more of an observation of life than it is of ministry-is this pattern of human beings that begins with this huge burst of excitement towards something that often settles into familiarity and so often ends in disappointment. Take for instance falling in love, or bringing home a newborn baby from the hospital, or a child’s first day of school, or the thrill of seeing your child learn how to read-these hallmark events (or Kodak moments if you will) in our lives that are so vivid and flush with promise at the time that seem all too often to lose their luster and fall away like leaves in the fall. I have sat with families as they flipped through the family photo albums noticing the moonstruck young couple now flabby, bored, and middle-aged, or that tiny baby now a troublesome teenager or rebellious college student, and they wonder how they could have ever succumbed to such a surge of emotions.

Within the church I have seen the same couples who years before came giddy with excitement to pre-marital counseling looking forward to marrying the “love of their lives” now coming back to the church embittered with their spouses asking for the churches help in negotiating a divorce. I have myself worked with addicts whom I bailed out and supported through treatment who just as quickly slide back down the same path of self-destruction. I have in more cases than I would like to admit worked with students whose lives have seemed so transformed by faith yet weeks and months later announcing, “This Christian thing was just a phase. I don’t really think religion is for me.” Ironically, this pattern that once disgusted me, now seems normal-often expected. We struggle in dying to self.

How do we keep excitement from fading into familiarity and finally into disappointment? Perhaps the better way to ask such a question is how do we garner Spiritual Growth in such a way that it heals and transforms individuals and societies around us? Living in a society that has turned Christianity into more of a corporation than a living movement, I feel like daily I need a reminder that the gospel is, at its roots, life-transforming and good news.

I am convinced we have created a monster in the American church today. In an attempt to protect Christianity from the demise of secularism, we have set forth rules and regulations in the church for the sake of pursuing holiness. We tip-toe the lines of legalism often falling its way for the sake of superiority and “spiritual maturity.” Loving your neighbor as yourself, caring for the poor, bringing about justice in your community, forgiving enemies-none of these reduce to a formula or set of rules. Any list of rules narrows the breadth of what God wants done to sinners toward a pointless competition of pseudo-saints. Faith becomes petty and irrelevant, not something that urgently matters. As Christians, we are wired to make a difference; yet too often we fall into this disappointing trap of legalistic paralysis. Sooner or later, familiarity, numbness, and disappointment will prevail.

Perhaps part of the problem is also in the message of Christianity-we tend to make Christianity as a one-time answer to life’s struggles instead of the life-changing, often times difficult, journey that it really is. We tend to forget that the Gospels do not speak of this false rendition of the gospel as prosperity because early Christians were far from ever prospering. Jesus spoke of those who would follow Him as encountering floggings, court trials, persecution, and betrayal. We tend to forget that 10 of the 12 disciples died a martyr’s death. God wants the best for His people; we have many promises that one day God will restore everything to its original state. But the Bible also portrays earth as an evil-plagued territory, and Christians get no exemption from these afflictions. Christians are just as likely as non-Christians to be poor, to be oppressed, to be struck with disease, and definitely to die. We want others to experience Christ, but we are afraid that the message of true Christianity will demolish anyone’s desire to be apart. As a result, we stick with a shallow gospel that leads to emotional bliss; yet just as quickly the emotions leave us, stagnancy sets in, and disappointment overtakes us.

My wife is a fruit connoisseur. Not too long ago I picked up an apple and actually attempted to think of the fruit from the fruits perspective. I thought of the words of Jesus that says in Galatians 5: “the fruit of the Spirit are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” These are qualities of God who wants to grow them inside of you. From the fruits perspective the ultimate goal is reproduction. That Red Delicious apple I held in my hand was bright and colorful in an attempt to attract an animal or me to pick it and deposit its seeds on the ground so that many more apples can grow. We too often think of fruit from our perspective, as though it were made for our enjoyment. From the apples point of view, our enjoyment is mainly a way to produce more apples. Could it be the goal of the fruit of the Spirit is indeed to produce more fruit in the lives of others than it is to bring emotional bliss? To bring glory to God through planting and spreading their very seeds in the hearts and minds of others than even to bring us physical comfort? As Christians, it is our responsibility to orient ourselves with the rest of the world. As I said above, we all have a desire to love, to communicate, and even to perpetuate ourselves in the lives of others. We are wired to share life in the knowledge of the sacrifices required.

Jesus did not come and die so that we cold live happy and self-indulgent lives to show the rest of the world our self-contentment. Instead, he came as an example for us to follow in His steps. “I tell you the truth,” said Jesus, “unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.”

Teenagers Must Be Allowed To Be The Church Today

Have you ever noticed that throughout Scripture God seems to use young people to accomplish some of His biggest and most significant purposes? Okay, I know He chose to have some really, really old people have babies and some people lived to be like 300 years old; I am not saying that He didn't use them as well. But think about it: For instance, He used a teenage girl named Esther to save a nation from certain disaster. He used a really cool young boy (not even a teenager yet) named Josiah to start a national revival. He used a shepherd boy named David to defeat a giant. He used Jeremiah, the young teenage prophet, to bring down His anger and wrath on a defiant and disobedient nation.

I remember when I was a teenager, it seemed like a huge task: the thought of being used by God to do some miraculous and crazy things just began to blow my mind and somewhat paralyzed me in fear. Jeremiah himself spoke about this feeling that He had and this inhibition He had about God using Him at such a young age: "Ah, Lord God! Behold, I cannot speak, for I am a youth. But the Lord said to me, 'Do not say I am a youth. For you shall go to all to whom I send you, and whatever I command you, you will speak'" (Jeremiah 1:6-7).

Sometimes we like to just limit things to the Bible-like miracles, healings, astonishing works of God, or in this case the use of a young person. We accept the fact that it happened in those days, but we have little faith that it could happen now. However, before we draw to too quick of a conviction that this doesn't happen in today's world, let us notice that actually church history confirms the divine propensity toward using the "way too young!" Throughout the Great Awakenings of the church, God has consistently used the "way too young" to accomplish His great purposes.

But why? 1 Corinthians 1:26-29 says some interesting things in this regard: "Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. God chose the foolish things of the earth to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things-and the things that are not-to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before Him."

So what does all this have to say to us about our churches now and our young people now? I think it says one thing very boldly and very clear: If God has the propensity to use the "way too young" to advance His message and purpose, then we should too!

We all know that the vast majority of those who come to Christ are under the age of 18 years of age. Why aren't we investing more to reach that demographic? Why are our churches becoming less focused on reaching the young, and more focused on harboring and sustaining the old? Too many churches are writing off the aim to reach the "way too young" to a Youth Pastor or Youth Program praying that they raise up future leaders of the church, yet the church is willing to do little to engage or incorporate those students into any strategic growth or evangelistic plan NOW. Perhaps it's fear of change, or the fear of their lack of wisdom. Yet, have we ever thought that a teenager who has been empowered and tuned into a passion for the glory of God to be made known can take the gospel way further way faster than any adult? Just think, in today's world teenagers have nearly 100 online and face to face friends and 100 times more influence in those individuals lives than any stranger would.

I am convinced if our teenagers can be inspired, equipped, and challenged to share the gospel of Jesus Christ in a clear and compelling way, our communities can begin being reached for Christ again. But we must have more than just a Youth Pastor and a few Youth Leaders who are willing to coach them and support them. We must have churches who are willing to embrace them, and allow them to take the church-it's mission and it's cause-where Christ is leading them. "God chose the foolish to shame the wise; God chose the weak to shame the strong."

We have encapsulated our teenagers to being the "church of tomorrow." Tomorrow is today, and our teenagers are the church of today! As soon as they believe in Jesus Christ they are baptized by the Holy Spirit and are given a gift to use and a message to preach! They don't become members of the church or "voices" in the church when they can tithe big and serve on a committee, but when they believe in Jesus Christ.

The future isn't when these teenagers GROW UP; the future is when these teenagers SHOW UP!

Why The 30 Hour Famine

XChange Student Ministry will be taking part in the 30 Hour Famine April 8-9, 2011. What that means is that over the next couple of months, Students from XChange Student Ministry will be working to raise funds to go toward World Hunger. We also will be continuing to discuss, pray, and be further educated in the needs toward World hunger. And then, on April 8-9, we will join together in going without food for 30 hours!

So why? Why would we do such a crazy thing like give up food for 30 hours? There are many reasons why our Students would make such a powerful mark. The greatest being that we can for a short amount of time stop, think, pray, and act towards those who are being oppressed. After all, this is a calling of the Christian life. Often times we fail at the first part-we fail to stop, think, pray, or act towards others. Let's face it, it's pretty easy for us to get caught up on our own lives. So, for just a few hours-30 to be exact-our students will set aside their hunger and desire for food in order to stop, think, pray, and act towards those who are hungry.

Though we will not be fed with physical food, we pray that God would fill us to the brim-to the point we are overflowing-with His grace, forgiveness, and passion to make a difference. On an individual level, we pray for life change. Life change in 30 hours you ask? Of course! When we set aside ourselves for the sake of others, our lives are changed. That's love!

No doubt, the weekend will be filled with tons of fun, lots of crazy games, teaching and discussion, worship of an Almighty God, serving our community, and more joice than one could possibly think they would ever consume. But more than that, we are hopeful and moved by the fact that we have the ability to make a difference.

If you are interested in partnering with us to help fight hunger, please click on the link to Donate. http://twv.convio.net/site/TR/30HourFamine/30HourFamine?team_id=17644&pg=team&fr_id=1310